Exceptions to the Rule
or
Biden's Speech Edited by a Film Geek

In half-hour speeches that mixed economic populism with sharp barbs, Biden sought to tighten a link between McCain and President George W. Bush, whose unpopularity Democrats have tried to exploit.

"As everyone knows, the sequel is always worse than the original," said Biden, a U.S. senator from Delaware.*

"Unless, of course," the senator continued, "You're talking about The Empire Strikes Back, because everyone knows it was better than Star Wars. And we all know Lucas hasn't made anything but horse-puckey since."

This statement was met with thunderous applause. Biden raised his hand to silence the crowd.

"Now, Spiderman was a great movie. It was the re-imagining of and relaunching of one of America's best super heros. Excusing some shoddy CGI, it was a fantastic movie. Spiderman Two, however, was brilliant, really taking the characters and stories to a new level. And Alfred Molina as Doc Oc... I mean, was he great or WHAT?!"

The audience roared in approval.

"But, I think we can all agree that Spiderman Three was no good, suffering from too many villains-itis," Biden continued, "Which goes to show that, you know, like I was saying--most of the time--the sequel is worse than the original."

Biden then added under his breath, "And then there's the Back to the Future movies which were all wonderful... and Aliens, which, though it was a sequel, was really a genre change. One might argue that the The Lord of the Rings films were really just one giant movie. The Dark Knight? Darker, yes, but better? Anyway..."

He then shouted, "TEEN WOLF TWO!!!" and barreled off the stage.

* It is here that Biden's actual quote ends.